Uruguay has weed and dolphins, say excited stoners

POTHEADS have been frantically booking flights after hearing about Uruguay's weed/dolphins combination.

NSA feared invasion by orcs

WORLD of Warcraft was monitored by NSA agents to assess the risk of orcs invading mainland America, it has been confirmed.

Rob Ford confirms Santa role

TORONTO mayor Rob Ford has confirmed his new role delivering gifts in a magical sleigh.

Humans left with no-one to impress

THE death of Nelson Mandela has left humanity without a single individual that you would genuinely not want to disappoint.

Cameron bootlegged during China visit

DAVID Cameron has been illegally copied while on a state visit to China.

Consumer fury as narcotics bought online fail to arrive

THE collapse of a 'deep web' shopping site has left hundreds of angry consumers without their drugs.

US sitcoms record baffling Thanksgiving episodes

SPECIAL Thanksgiving episodes of sitcoms which will confuse British audiences in six months' time are now being shown in America.

Independent Scotland to have a Jacuzzi

AN independent Scotland will have a spa bath, state-of-the-art multi-room audio and an ‘intelligent fridge’.