International

UK to intervene on both sides of Syria conflict

BRITAIN is to simultaneously help both sides in Syria's bloody civil war, it has emerged.

China sending 450 million women into space

THE People's Republic of China has announced plans for its entire female population to become astronauts.

Putin's Olympics tickets on eBay

TICKETS for the London 2012 Olympics belonging to Russian president Vladimir Putin are available for purchase on eBay.

Annan decks Assad

KOFI Annan has floored Syria's President Bashar al-Assad with a single blow.

Euros disintegrating in sunlight

EURO banknotes are dissolving into thin air at the touch of the sun as if they were never real.

France surrenders to Thor

PRESIDENT Francois Hollande has confirmed France’s unconditional surrender to the Norse god of thunder.

Greeks apologise with huge horse

THE nation of Greece said sorry to the European Union with a present of an enormous wooden horse.

Al Qaeda 'getting its ideas from Viz'

AN underpants-based terror plot has fuelled speculation that Al Quaeda is being inspired by adult humour comic Viz.