Gibraltar ship was chartered by bored apes

APES frustrated by Gibraltar's lack of entertainment had hired a Spanish ship to get them off the rock, it has emerged.

Victoria's Secret girls look spectacularly dead behind the eyes

UNDERWEAR models at the Victoria's Secret show have wowed audiences with the eerie emptiness in their eyes.

Protesters demand V for Vendetta sequel

MASKED protestors around the world have called for a sequel to the 2006 dystopian thriller V For Vendetta.

Scottish border guards would force Englishmen to squeal like a pig

AN independent Scotland would have border checkpoints where guards would force English tourists to squeal like pigs.

America spied on Yorkshire ‘for about five minutes’

AMERICA’S National Security Agency tapped the phone calls of Yorkshire for five minutes before throwing its headphones across the room in horror.

Nobel Prize for YouTube comments shortlist announced

THE Nobel committee has selected the potential winners of this year's YouTube comments prize.

UN unveils capitalism opt-out region

THE UN has given people who don't like capitalism the option to try something else instead.

Abandoned Washington DC becomes ape habitat

THE abandoned capital of the United States has been colonised by apes after just three days of a government shutdown.