ISRAEL'S attack on a Palestinian aid ship will make it easier for Guardian readers to sound as if they know what they are talking about, it was claimed last night.
DOZENS of women have written to Pope Benedict asking if Roman Catholic priests can be allowed the occasional hand job.
A MALTESE town is to cover its famous phallic statue in a school uniform to avoid offending the Pope.
AN American teenager has announced plans to scale Mount Everest so he can finally masturbate in peace.
THE Vatican really did have no knowledge of the Nazi's systematic extermination of Jews during World War II, it was claimed last night.
FORMER US president George W Bush has urged Hollywood actress Cameron Diaz to help secure the support of 'onionists' for the devolution of policing powers in Northern Ireland.