THE European Union has praised Britain for the calm, efficient way it has dealt with the aftermath of the referendum.
EVERY country in the former British Empire has demanded Britain resume full political control now it has proven it is great again.
SCOTLAND has thanked the rest of the UK for the good times on its way out.
ICELANDIC singer Bjork is flying to France to kick Cristiano Ronaldo’s arse, police have confirmed.
PEOPLE of different races, creeds and sexual orientations all think Donald Trump is a f**ker, it has emerged.
THE next president of America will be either partially or completely insane, it has been confirmed.
BUILDING the longest tunnel in the world proves that Switzerland is a sexy and desirable nation, says the country’s president.
A CONSPIRACY theorist, UFO nut and street-ranter has surprised everyone by being a fervent supporter of the In campaign.