Greek economy wired to bombs

GREECE has been fitted with explosives that will detonate if growth dips below two per cent of GDP.

Merkel: Germany has never done anything wrong

IN A time of economic crisis it falls to that exemplar of nations, Germany, to explain how to be completely faultless to others.

Yanis Varoufakis to become mysterious tough drifter

GREECE’S former finance minister has unveiled plans to ride around on his motorbike having martial arts battles with local villains.

Zeus not keen to confront Merkel

GREEK king of the gods Zeus has warned his mortal subjects that he is not up for any sort of confrontation with Angela Merkel.

Greece holds decisive referendum on Christ knows what

THE Greek people are ready to give their final yes or no vote on an unknown issue that will decide their entire future.

Germany's a bit depressing, says Queen

THE Queen is not enjoying her visit to Germany, it has emerged.

Greece changes subject to new series of True Detective

GREEK debt talks have broken down after the country kept changing the subject to the new series of True Detective.

Family’s excitement at getting on ferry rapidly fades

BEING on a ferry is f**king boring, a strike-hit British family has discovered.