Trump blames cancelled London visit on Kirstie and Phil from ‘Location, Location, Location’

PRESIDENT Trump has blamed his cancelled London visit on Barack Obama selling the US Embassy when he appeared on Location, Location, Location. 

Trump believes his predecessor was conned by Kirtsie Allsopp and Phil Spencer into selling the Grosvenor Square embassy for ‘peanuts’ thanks to the pair’s undervaluation of the property.

He continued: “The nanny girl and the sex pervert completely conned Obama, who knows nothing about real estate because he wasted his time in politics, and he fell for their British lies like a dog!

“Sold a beautiful embassy which I would have made into an extremely successful hotel because he was afraid she would give him a ‘spanking’! Sad!”

The president has demanded that the presenters be hung, drawn and quartered in front of him on his official state visit, because he knows that Britain still does that sort of thing.

Barack Obama admitted: “They show you so many properties and talk about how much money you’ll make and by the end of the show you’re so bamboozled you’ll agree to anything.

“Also, I was dumb thinking I could project manage the build of the new embassy myself, without any experience. Kevin warned me about that.”