Couple pathetically claim to be ‘into hotels’

A COUPLE have made the sickening claim that their hobby is staying in expensive hotels. 

Julian and Naomi Cook have told friend that paying upwards of £300 to sleep in a room with deep carpets and a large window is the single activity in which they are most interested.

Julian Cook said: “Some people like to paint, others like to sew, we like to stay in very expensive hotels.

“But it’s not like we just raid the mini-bar, watch a Gerard Butler film on pay-per-view then crash out. We carefully ‘research’ the hotels in books like Martin Bomfay’s Pretentious Escapes 2017.

“It’s deep. You might not get it.”

Friend Tom Booker said: “What do they do when they visit the Hotel du Romance, just stay in looking at the Queen Anne chairs and oil paintings of wine? Do they have a shower and say ‘Ah, that was well worth £80?’

“It’s like getting a taxi just for the experience of being in a taxi. Even if it had oak love seats and an antique stained-glass screen between you and the driver, it would still be a fucking taxi.”