Stoner to miss official cannabis day

A WEED-SMOKER will inevitably miss the official stoner day ‘4/20’ due to being in a cannabis-induced haze.

Brighton-based Nathan Muir has been telling friends 4/20 will be “epic” but will ruin his chances of noticing the date by doing a bong hit immediately after waking.

He will then eschew any news media which might remind him of what day it is in favour of Adventure Time on Cartoon Network, before spending six hours ‘working on his music’ and smoking spliffs.

On a trip to the shop to pick up vital supplies including Rizlas, bread and Tangfastics, Muir will be greeted by several acquaintances who will remind him of the date but go unheard because of his massive headphones.

He will also miss numerous voicemails and calls from friends inviting him to 4/20-related events while so high he is unable to move.

Muir will only realise he has missed the date tomorrow, when he accidentally swipes his phone’s notifications while reading a Wikipedia article about Dr Strange.

He is likely to say: “Aw, man, I missed 4/20? That sucks. I was gonna smoke up all day.”