News

UK celebrates record number of shit jobs

THE number of shit jobs in Britain has reached an all-time time high.

Everyone agrees to pretend dubstep didn't happen

DUBSTEP – the music that sounds like a fat horse falling down a well – never occurred, everyone has agreed.

'Cosplay not just fancy dress' says man dressed as Chewbacca or maybe some kind of hairy elf

A MAN who spends his weekends dressing up as some sort of sci-fi chipmunk creature has defended the practice.

Woman giving herself pep talk in mirror accidentally summons Morrissey

A WOMAN giving herself a motivational pep talk in the mirror has accidentally summoned Morrissey.

Parents practising shocked expressions ahead of son's shit A-level results

A COUPLE are working hard on their shocked faces in preparation for their son’s inevitably shitty A-level results.

How much money would it take for you to just f**k off? world asks Trump

THE global population has asked Donald Trump to name his price for f**king off and never coming back.

Cat judging owner for taking it out on lead

A CAT being taken for a walk on a lead has condemned its owner as ‘a weirdo’, along with everyone else in the park.

DVD still not working despite being wiped on man's trouser leg 


A DVD is still not working despite the owner wiping it on his jeans before putting it back into the machine.