News

Attention-seeking weather told to grow-up

BRITAIN’S insecure, attention-seeking climate has been told to get a grip.

Israel offers eight-second ceasefire

ISRAEL has reached out to Palestinians with the offer of a ceasefire lasting almost nine seconds.

Irish name pronounced how it’s written

NEW Irish employee Kyla Burns has surprised her colleagues by revealing there are no hidden letters in her name.

Sticky Londoners demand hose action

HEAT-crazed Londoners have taken to the streets demanding to be attacked by a water cannon.

Marchers ordered to amble instead

NORTHERN Ireland’s marching season is to be transformed into a series of pleasant strolls.

Avoid all sunlight forever, say goths

GOTHS have warned against exposure to sunlight during and after the heatwave.

Daily Mail rates the outfits of Gaza Strip refugees

BRITAIN’S leading 1950s newspaper has provided a fashion rundown of female Palestinians fleeing airstrikes.

Crazed struggle for one-upmanship called 'lifestyle'

BRITONS' manic obsession with having more material goods than their peers is actually just 'lifestyle', according to experts.