BBC Breakfast host Bill Turnbull is a right-wing agent provocateur sent to discredit the corporation, it has emerged.
A WOMAN travelling in a train’s ‘quiet zone’ has declared the entire journey must be spent in a deathly, mausoleum-like silence.
ADULTERY websites lead to hassle, paranoia and sex with sad middle aged people who keep bursting into tears.
THE Royal family can be as fascist as it wants, as long as it keeps producing lovely babies, it has been agreed.
UNBEARABLY smug seaside twat haven Brighton is to ban ordinary people.
THE Queen has made it clear that she has never been in favour of the Holocaust.
MARKS & Spencer is set to replace Percy Pigs with methadone at its tills.
AN Australian surfer has celebrated beating a shark in a fight by drinking a tin of weak, fizzy beer.
- New Ant-Man film mainly about how dirty everything is
- We will raise interest rates, says Bank of England’s chief necromancer
- Septum rings ‘have the same timeless appeal as eyebrow piercings’
- Kids looking forward to carefree summer being a massive burden
- NASA probe submits $11bn claim for ‘travel to work’ expenses