Old hatchbacks better than supercars, say boy racers

BOY racers have confirmed that they drive fairly old hatchbacks because they prefer them to supercars.

People who say ‘If you don’t know me don’t judge me’ all dreadful

BELIEF in popular slogans about not being judgemental is a defining characteristic of arseholes, it has been claimed.

Human beats highly advanced computer at drinking

A MAN has beaten a sophisticated artificial intelligence machine at drinking beer.

Scotland secretly in love with England

THE people of Scotland have admitted to the secret love they have for the English.

32-year-old admits she doesn't understand GIFs

A 32-YEAR-OLD woman has confessed to close friends that she is completely GIF-illiterate.

Archbishop of Canterbury in racist bus rant

A MAN wearing the robes and mitre of the Archbishop of Canterbury has been filmed on a bus ranting about migrants.

New cafe opens for men trapped in ‘Friend Zone’

TRAGICALLY deluded men will be able to nurture their crush in a new Friend Zone cafe.

Faking death fails to end gym membership

A MAN’S fight to end his gym membership continues despite an elaborate scheme to fake his own death.