Woman planning 'baby shower' reminded it's a load of American bullshit

A PREGNANT woman who is planning to have a 'baby shower' has been reminded this is not America and it is therefore bullshit.

44-year-old thinks he deserves birthday party

A MAN is so full of himself he believes he deserves a party to celebrate his 44th birthday.

Public relations executive keeps insisting she's working class

A PUBLIC relations executive keeps telling people she is somehow 'working class', it has emerged.

Man who quit drinking and smoking now addicted to judging people

A MAN who adopted a ‘clean living’ lifestyle is now getting 'high' on being incredibly sanctimonious.

Trump-Putin handshake summons Beelzebub as predicted

THE handshake between Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin has summoned the Devil, as experts predicted.

More young people forced to live in parents’ glass-fronted living room cabinets

YOUNG Britons unable to get on the property ladder are living in their parents’ glass-fronted display cabinets.

Northerners denounce contactless payment as 'the Devil's hocus pocus'

CONTACTLESS payment is Lucifer's dark magic, the people of the North have declared.

Thatcher statue to be officially unveiled then officially toppled

A STATUE of Margaret Thatcher is to be erected then immediately pulled down and destroyed by a cheering crowd.