News

Millions take 'digital detox' to remind themselves how bored they used to be

ONE-THIRD of UK internet users have taken a break from the internet to remember how boring and inconvenient life used to be.

Welsh lottery winners splash out on Wales

A WELSH family who scooped a massive lottery win decided to buy their country of birth, they have revealed.

One in five HSBC cashpoint transactions to release snakes

TWENTY per cent of HSBC cashpoint withdrawals will release deadly venomous snakes in order to restore the bank’s profits, they have confirmed.

Trump gives three-hour talk about UFOs

AFTER claiming the US election is rigged, Donald Trump has given a lengthy slideshow presentation about UFOs and lizard aliens.

I took a big pay cut to follow my dream, says patronising wanker

A FORMER banker who is now a baker cannot help mentioning how much money he used to earn.

Man who’d never heard of blue passports until yesterday now demanding one

A 22-YEAR-OLD man who first heard about blue British passports in yesterday’s Sun is now demanding one as his patriotic right.

Greggs introduces healthy options for weak, scared people

BAKER Greggs has unveiled a series of lighter menu options for people who lack the integrity to buy a sausage roll.

Man humiliated by better guitarist playing his guitar

A PARTY has ended in humiliation for the host after a much better musician picked up his guitar.