Daily Mail sent chocolate mosque with note saying ‘bite me’

THE Daily Mail has taken delivery of an elaborate chocolate mosque accompanied by an angry note.

Shit, he's onto me, says Obama

PRESIDENT Obama has apparently fled the White House after realising Rupert Murdoch has seen through his deception.

Privy Council relevant for first time since 1659

THE Privy Council has become a topic of conversation for the first time in almost 400 years.

Supermarket delivery man disgusted by your laziness

A SUPERMARKET delivery driver is wondering why you can’t get your fat arse to a shop.

Corporate bastard hiding behind fun desk ornaments

AN office worker’s collection of amusing desk ornaments hides his sly, toadying personality, it has emerged.

Hurry up and die, Britain tells Tesco

BRITAIN has asked Tesco if it could stop dragging it out and just die.

Couple has f**king website for wedding

A COUPLE'S forthcoming wedding has a whole f**king website devoted to it.

Truancy now a GCSE subject

THE problem of truancy has been solved by making it into a qualification.