A FEARLESS adventurer has stunned friends by venturing overseas with scant regard for lost luggage or flight delays.
STAR Wars: The Force Awakens will be 33 per cent black screen with Andy Serkis intoning portentous statements.
U2 WILL skip an inevitable decade of falling sales, a split and solo albums by going directly to the long-awaited reunion tour, it has been announced.
BRITONS have given their full support to any activity that involves stealth bombers.
SALES of tiresome penis and fart-related joke products are expected to hit £569bn today.
A MARRIED couple who have not spoken since 1994 have no idea what they are called, their children confirmed.
CATHEDRAL architects must be vetted so they do not design buildings that look Turkish, UKIP has demanded.
ALL remaining public assets are to be transferred to Richard Branson to see what he does with them.