A DADDY long legs trapped in a bath has admitted the situation is far from ideal.
THE story that went round last week about David Cameron has completely disappeared from the public mind, it has emerged.
THE child of a smoker is thrilled with his sturdy new walking boots and 'military-style' compass.
A NORTHERN man has left a trail of terror across London by attempting to interact socially with everyone he meets.
BEASTIE Boys co-founder Adam Horovitz has apologised for inspiring bombastic dirge-metallers Rage Against the Machine.
ANY future prime minister must be willing to guarantee the total destruction of the UK in a nuclear war.
FREE plastic bags have issued a message of solidarity and respect before going home to deep space.
EMPLOYEES have responded to an innovative office hot desking policy by developing fierce territorial instincts.