BRITONS are coldly assessing the value of friends and relatives to decide what quality of Christmas card they should receive, it has emerged.
THE UK now has 36,402,339 different social classes, all of which can be detected and categorised in a face-to-face meeting in less than a minute.
A MAN has argued that his grey jumper counts as a Christmas jumper because that is what Christmas feels like.
AN EPIDEMIC of Pandora bracelets is pushing women’s arms to breaking point, doctors have warned.
A MAN who prides himself on being able to detect ‘bullshit’ believes some incredibly stupid things.
DONALD Trump has accused Islam of ‘f**king up his once beautiful head of hair’.
A FAMILY was stupidly optimistic about being able to keep themselves entertained without electricity, it has emerged.
A MAN is claiming that his exercise regime is about something other than sex.