News

UKIP defends freedom by reporting everyone to the police

UKIP has launched a passionate defence of traditional Anglo-Saxon freedoms by reporting everyone in Britain to the police.

Gay computer is old people's worst fear

A COMPUTER that talks in an effeminate male voice is the biggest fear of the over-70s.

Housing boom at risk because moving is such a pain in the arse

THE UK's housing boom could collapse as people realise what a nightmare moving is, it has been claimed.

Royal Mail to sell personalised postcodes

THE Royal Mail is to auction personalised postcodes to homeowners seeking to make their addresses more sexy.

Government adding cocaine to tap water

HUGE amounts of cocaine are being added to the water supply in a bid to make the population more productive.

Callous monster not tweeting about Boko Haram

A WOMAN from Cheltenham has been condemned for her ongoing silence about Boko Haram on social media.

'Life' is top university, say bitter dads

THE University of Life has once again been declared the best educational establishment by bitter middle aged men.

Rich List includes ransom amounts

THIS year's Sunday Times Rich List includes guideline ransom figures for kidnapped billionaires.