News

Historically accurate 80s night features nuclear paranoia, AIDS and riots

A NEW 1980s-themed nightclub gives patrons an authentic experience of a profoundly painful decade.

‘Socialising’ means getting pissed

THE term ‘socialising’ actually means drinking heavily, it has emerged.

Nice girls pretending to look forward to Glastonbury

WELL-GROOMED young women who do not take drugs are pretending to be excited about attending Glastonbury Festival.

Jury asked if it could find Coulson ‘ultra-guilty’

ANDY Coulson’s completely obvious involvement in phone hacking prompted his trial jury to ask if they could find him more than guilty.

Queen intensely interested in Game of Thrones sex scenes

THE Queen’s visit to the Game of Thrones set in Belfast was dominated by detailed questions about the show’s sexual content.

One in five hospitals not actually hospitals

MORE than 20% of buildings that claim to be hospitals are nothing of the kind, it has emerged.

Dad decides not to leave children his Ikea furniture and DVDs

FATHER-OF-TWO Tom Booker has decided his children will not inherit his personal fortune of two Billy bookcases, some DVDs and a broken cross-trainer.

Manchester-Leeds train link to revolutionise fighting

A HIGH-SPEED train service will halve the time it takes to commute between Leeds and Manchester for a fight.