DOCTORS will not use voluntary euthanasia laws to do lots of murders, they have confirmed.
THE UK Passport Office has insisted there would be no backlog in applications if everyone could just have the same name.
ALL women working in science have jacked it in to become bishops.
THE prime minister has announced that £1.1 billion is to be spent creating a major British superhero.
CHERYL Cole has described her marriage to a Frenchman as ‘perfect’, because they have no idea what they are saying to each other.
THE death of Tommy Ramone has left most people who wear Ramones t-shirts emotionally unaffected.
IRISH fans of country star Garth Brooks have been offered a stout BBC pundit as a replacement.
EIGHTEEN workers have died after a USB stick was removed from a computer without adequate precautions.