MANY of this year's lambs are being born jaded.
ADVERTS for Febreze 'fabric refresher' have caused numerous cases of hepatitis.
GENUINELY eccentric people are selling their character traits to young social media obsessives, it has emerged.
BRITAIN will oppose an EU ban on gently warming the testicles of bankers.
MORRISSEY’S cat thinks his owner is a knob, it has emerged.
MANY local councils are to charge more for what amounts to emptying bins, it has emerged.
THE UK is going to be a total bastard to foreigners and people in general, David Cameron has announced.