News

Families furious at disappointing Game of Thrones fun day

DOZENS of angry parents have complained about a badly organised Game of Thrones fun day.

That’s how teeth are supposed to look, says Britain

BRITAIN’S teeth are imperfect because they haven’t had lots of weird expensive shit done to them, it has emerged.

Slankets ‘unacceptable’

BLANKETS with arms have no place in a civilised world, it has been claimed.

Ancient demonic entity saving kids from half term boredom

PARENTS have praised Mexican demon Charlie for giving children something to do during the half term break.

Dog really pissed off with O2

LABRADOR Tom Booker wants to bite everyone at O2 after his mobile phone stopped working yesterday.

Apple designer Jony Ive admits he can only draw oblongs

APPLE design guru Sir Jonathan Ive has admitted his iconic designs are based on his inability to draw anything except oblongs.

Things that live in the sea found off British coast

BRITAIN’S coastal waters are being invaded by sea-dwelling creatures.

Carveries recognised as a religion

'GOING to the carvery' is now the UK’s biggest belief system.