A FAN of The Stone Roses has lied to himself and friends by saying how much he loves the band’s new single All For One.
PARENTS of children under six have warned the government that if it lays a finger on CBeebies they will burn Westminster down.
FRIENDS of 28-year-old Julian Cook fear they have lost him forever after he embraced aspirational bullshit.
A BIRD is sceptical that a flimsy construction of twigs and mud is suitable to live in, he has admitted.
A RECEPTIONIST at a leading City firm has been sent home without pay for refusing to wear a jewelled leather codpiece.
A RADIOHEAD fan will never fully recover from reading a four-star review of their new album, it has emerged.
A WOMAN has given up her bid to look good on a one-week holiday in favour of a summer full of drink and bacon, it has emerged.
BREAKFAST is the least important meal of the day, it has been confirmed.
- Corsodyl advert shows woman being murdered by her own teeth
- Can you put all this in an email for me? asks manager who doesn't know what else to say
- Money environmentalists defend tax havens
- Shit thick internet users puzzled by not particularly hard maths question
- Dad who was miserable failure with girls forced to give relationship advice