MILLIONS of Britons who dreamed of a coastal cottage would now prefer something several hundred miles inland.
THE twisted troglodytes who inhabit London have been forced to expose themselves to daylight.
KRISPY Kreme doughnuts are weird because they come from Mars, it has emerged.
HEALTH watchdogs have warned heroin addicts that they are risking their lives by consuming up to eighteen spoonfuls of sugar a day.
THE glacier that spawned the 'Titanic iceberg' has denied any malicious intent.
Official guidelines for safely handling encounters with white BMWs, Mercedes and Audis have been published by the Department of Transport.
IT is not possible to be cool and a parent, experts have warned.
THE Lloyds horse has stepped down after losing confidence in the bank.