News

Greece to set up some sort of tax system

GREECE is to establish a system that collects money from its citizens.

Your dad could still have you in a fight

MODERN men have been warned that their fathers could easily kick the shit out of them.

Mysterious Siberian craters would be awesome rave venue, confirm scientists

RESEARCHERS have discovered huge craters in Siberia that would be perfect for a rave.

Binge drinkers ‘most intelligent and sensitive’

BINGE drinkers are highly sensitive intellectuals coping with the inherent pain of human existence, it has emerged.

Rolf Harris stripped of Stylophone

ROLF Harris has been stripped of his honorary Stylophone.

Middle class person has not seen War Horse play

A MEMBER of the middle class has admitted not having seen the stage version of Warhorse.

Daily Mail still surprised that people who went to public school can f*ck up

THE Daily Mail will never get over the novelty of privately educated people making bad decisions, it has been confirmed.

Opinions restricted to those who have seen new Adam Curtis film

PEOPLE who have yet to watch Adam Curtis's Bitter Lake have been banned from expressing views on anything.