CIA still laughing at Zuckerberg for thinking he came up with Facebook

CIA AGENTS are still chuckling to themselves about how Mark Zuckerberg actually thinks he created Facebook.

Everyone secretly addicted to 35p non-brand energy drinks

EVERYONE in Britain is secretly drinking 15-20 cans of cheap, unbranded energy drinks a day, it has been confirmed.

Huge spider in no way more scared of you than you are of it

A MASSIVE spider has confirmed that it is in no way more scared of you than you are of it, so you best just keep walking.

Mum horrified by internet hoax from 2008

A MUM has reacted with shock and disgust to a photo that everyone else realised was a hoax eight years ago, it has emerged.

F**king Teletubbies earning more than you

THE bastard Teletubbies earn more than you do, it has emerged.

Backpacker denies responsibility for rucksack’s actions

A TOURIST claims his rucksack acted independently when it smashed into the faces of fellow passengers on a crowded train.

Child watching sister’s birth not sure if this really counts as a treat

AN EIGHT-YEAR-OLD watching his mother give birth would rather be at the zoo, it has emerged.

Olympics-themed office fun 'not fun'

OLYMPICS-RELATED office 'fun' only serves to highlight the shitness of work, it has emerged.