PEOPLE who chose ridiculous email addresses before the internet properly caught on will be allowed to anonymously exchange them.
THE new Cold War with Scotland has intensified with the discovery of radio transmitters in shortbread.
THE prime minister’s promise to give everyone "the dignity of a job" has confused Britons whose jobs are a humiliating parade of shame.
A MARRIED couple are sending each other flirtatious tweets, horrified onlookers have confirmed.
INEXPLICABLY popular assault course event Tough Mudder has introduced a new obstacle that involves having a conversation about non mud-based things.
THE UK’s ball pits must be accessible to drunk adults, according to new legal guidelines.
A HOMELESS man has returned a coffee that was given to him by someone exploiting Waitrose’s free drinks offer.
THE last of the renegade Nazis living in a self-sufficient lunar colony has died, aged 95.