THE Birmingham schools accused of teaching Islamic extremism had To Kill a Mockingbird on their syllabus, OFSTED has revealed.
THE British judicial system has seen unprecedented demand for tickets for the upcoming secret trial of two unnamed terrorists.
THE veterans of D-Day have marked the 70th anniversary by thanking Britain for becoming shallow and worthless.
ATTRACTIVE people who only hang out with other good-looking individuals are dicks, it has emerged.
THIS year's Big Brother contestants have discovered their predecessors have been trapped in the house for the last nine months.
MILLIONS of Britons are taking pills at work to commemorate the life of 'godfather of ecstasy' Alexander Shulgin.
SKIVING desk workers can no longer recall how they got through the day before they had websites to look at.
THE People's Republic of China has marked the 25th anniversary of everyone having a pleasant, uneventful day out in Tiananmen Square.