A WOMAN has failed to realise that outrageous fashions are just part of a grim celebrity publicity machine.
LISTS of the best cultural things of the year are deliberately composed to make you feel stupid, their creators have admitted.
PARENTS across the country are making every effort possible not to see their children's Christmas plays.
DEADLY intelligent machines are preferable to ‘cute’ kid androids that bang on about not being real children, according to experts.
BRITAIN is desperate to see breasts except when they are being used to feed a baby, it has been claimed.
THE government is to spend almost £600 billion on the four biggest things it could think of.
THE volume of attractive wives needing immediate no-strings sexual encounters is becoming a humanitarian crisis, it has been claimed.
A GRANDMOTHER in Lancashire has begun boiling the vegetables for her Christmas dinner.