News

Nutella makers launch injectable chocolate

THE creators of Nutella have unveiled a new chocolate product that is taken intravenously.

Kim and Kanye to hold Caligula-themed wedding

THE wedding of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, to be held in Italy tomorrow, will be themed after the cruelties of Rome’s most depraved Emperor.

Brainstorming ideas recorded and used against you

FRIENDLY brainstorming sessions are used to work out who should be sacked.

BBC Swearing to be launched

THE BBC is to launch an experimental swearing channel to test whether anyone really give a toss if the word “fuck” is heard on daytime TV.

Official World Cup anthem makes no reference to football or World Cup

WORLD Cup anthem singers Pitbull and Jennifer Lopez do not know what football is, it has been claimed.

I’d have eaten toddler myself if it was smaller, says 'hero cat'

AMERICA'S 'hero cat' has admitted she would kill humans if they were small enough to fit in her mouth.

Audi TTs driven exclusively by people who can't really afford them

EVERYONE who owns an Audi TT is living slightly beyond their means, it has emerged.

Putin compares Charles to Anthea Turner

VLADIMIR Putin has compared Prince Charles to Anthea Turner because he is a ‘fragrant, middle-aged woman with no power’.