Nuns to teach Tristram Hunt that he’s dirty and wrong

CATHOLIC nuns have pledged to teach Tristram Hunt that he is a dirty boy who makes Jesus angry.

GCHQ less intrusive than Myleene Klass

A COURT has ruled that GCHQ illegally spied on private emails but, unlike Myleene Klass, did not share them with 460,000 followers on Twitter.

New Britflick shows positive side of life of crime

A NEW British film aimed at teenagers will show the glamorous reality of life as a drug-dealer on a council estate.

Big accountancy firm accused of saving people money

BRITAIN'S biggest accountancy firm has been accused of organising its clients’ finances and helping them reduce their tax bills.

Online personality quiz finds user to be gullible procrastinator

AN ONLINE personality test has proved 100 per cent accurate in predicting the woman completing it is self-obsessed and bored with her job.

ISIS handbook to be turned into Cosmo column

TIPS on how to be a female jihadi will soon appear in the pages of Cosmopolitan, the magazine has confirmed.

NASA probe seeks new planets to borrow money from

A NASA space probe has been launched to find Earth-like planets who can lend us money.

New Harper Lee book finally explains how to kill mockingbirds

AUTHOR Harper Lee has promised that her new book will contain explicit instructions on how to catch and kill mockingbirds.