News

Tipping bullshit on every level

EVERYTHING about tipping in restaurants is idiotic, customers and waiters have agreed.

Everyone f**king hates gardening

ANYONE who claims to enjoy gardening is a liar, it has emerged.

Woman’s headache caused by every single aspect of her life

A WOMAN’S persistent headaches are caused by her job, commute, family life, relationship with her partner and hobbies, she has found.

Bus driver gives change from a tenner without being a twat about it

A BUS driver has given change from a £10 note without acting like it is a natural disaster.

Being ginger too high a price to pay for immortality

THE discovery that the ginger gene contains the secret of youthful looks has united the world in rejection of this Faustian bargain.

Friend-with-benefits votes to reduce benefits

A WOMAN has announced a unilateral reduction in benefits for her casual sexual partner.

Father praised for looking after child for four whole hours

A MAN has won plaudits for looking after his daughter for a whole afternoon without supervision from his wife.

Anywhere getting snow must have done something to deserve it, say southerners

THE north of England and Scotland are only getting snow because they have done something terrible to deserve it, southerners believe.