Women go off sex because it is silly

WOMEN lose interest in sex during long-term relationships because the whole thing is just silly, a survey has found.

Dad calls breasts 'knockers'

A FATHER refers to women's breasts as ‘knockers’, it has emerged.

Homeless people love it, says government

HOMELESSNESS is an exciting lifestyle choice and nothing to do with cutting benefits, the government has claimed.

Liberal unable to mention any historical figure without adding that they were racist

A LIBERAL man is unable to discuss any writers, musicians or historical figures born before 1970 without mentioning that they were racist.

Patrick Bateman tells George Osborne to tone it down a bit

GEORGE Osborne’s investment banker friend Patrick Bateman has told him saying he wants Theresa May ‘chopped up in bags in my freezer’ is a bit creepy.

Middle-class family's showing off enters 'getting some chickens' phase

A MIDDLE-CLASS family has got some chickens as part of their ongoing commitment to showing off.

Nation divided over whether to put the heating on

BRITAIN is divided over whether or not it is cold enough to turn on the heating, it has been confirmed.

Doctor Foster shocks fans of original nursery rhyme

THE BBC’S adaptation of nursery rhyme Doctor Foster has shocked fans with its graphic sex scenes.