News
Firm Offers 'Twats-Only' Activity Holidays
A BRITISH travel firm is believed to be the first in the world to offer activity holidays guaranteed to be filled with twats.
Wanking Kills
MEN who spent their 20s and 30s in an endless cavalcade of frenzied masturbation will die because of it, according to a new study.
BBC To Screen Gaza Appeal If It Includes Phone-In Scam
THE BBC has agreed to air a charity appeal for the stricken people of Gaza, as long as they can include a fraudulent phone-in contest, it emerged last night.
Obama Shuts Down 'Grey's Anatomy'
PRESIDENT Barack Obama yesterday fulfilled a key campaign promise by announcing the closure of Grey's Anatomy.
Daily Alcohol Limits Not Really Working For Us, Say Drinkers
THESE recommended daily limits on alcohol the government has come up with are really not doing it for us, drinkers said last night.
British Gas To Let You Eat
BRITISH Gas has agreed to leave you just enough money so you can eat.
Doctors Recommend Kebabs For High Testicle Content
THE doner kebab is a nutritious snack filled with zinc and proteins from the compacted shavings of at least 14 different varieties of testicle, doctors said last night.
US Chief Justice Missing
JOHN Roberts, the Chief Justice of the US Supreme Court, was missing last night after ruining Barack Obama's inauguration.