A SUCCESSFUL simulated Mars mission saw encounters with aliens and also zombies, according to the children who organised it.
THE National Health Service is now little more than a front for illegal boxing matches between frail pensioners, according to a new report.
THE Egyptian army last night thanked demonstrators in Cairo for their military coup, adding that it was a very nice one.
THE BBC has been accused of encouraging annoyance with its new series about a Jamaican rodent.
BRITAIN today asked Melanie Phillips to wait a second while it settled into its favourite chair with a big bag of crisps.
TERRIFYING online collective Mumsnet has revealed a predilection for high-grade online filth.
MICROSOFT was today applying some rouge and lipstick to the dead face of Nokia.
CHILD'S game manufacturer Activision is ditching the Guitar Hero franchise for the simulated thrill of stealing dreadful music.