News

Interest in Lindsay Lohan classified as mental illness

HAVING an interest in Lindsay Lohan is a form of insanity, psychiatrists have confirmed.

Twitter appeals Barton ban

PEOPLE wanting to use Twitter without their heads exploding have appealed Joey Barton’s 12-match ban.

Convicts voting Tory

PRISONERS are unanimously going to vote Conservative, it has emerged.

DC Comics reveals all Marvel characters are gay

IRON MAN, the Hulk and all other Marvel Comics characters ever have been outed as gay by rival publisher DC.

Lost rave tribe found beneath Hacienda

A SEMI-MYTHICAL group of troglodyte ravers has been discovered by workmen at Manchester's legendary Hacienda.

Yeti DNA database launched

SCIENTISTS are collecting sasquatch DNA in a bid to cut man-ape crime, it has emerged.

Kim Kardashian to face Pippa Middleton in buttock duel

US REALITY star Kim Kardashian will face Pippa Middleton in a buttock-based confrontation that could decide the future of the monarchy.

Skyfall released as preview to trailer

THE latest two-hour Bond feature Skyfall has been released as a teaser for the more exciting trailer.