Workers' carrot to remain slightly out of reach

GEORGE Osborne has announced that the carrot you want will remain tantalisingly beyond your grasp for a little longer.

Rich people ‘a bunch of freaks’

ALL rich people are total freaks, experts have confirmed.

83% of Monocle readers still live with their mum

MOST people who read Monocle magazine are still based in their childhood bedroom, it has emerged.

Parents warned to stop calling their children Lily or Jack

BRITISH parents' desire to give all children the name Jack or Lily could have sociological repercussions, experts have warned.

Cameron bootlegged during China visit

DAVID Cameron has been illegally copied while on a state visit to China.

UK pupils maintain respectful distance from future Chinese employers

BRITAIN’S school pupils are allowing Chinese children to beat them in every academic subject in order to ensure a harmonious future workplace.

Stop calling it your money, says RBS

THE Royal Bank of Scotland has reminded customers that 'their' money is actually its money.

Consumer fury as narcotics bought online fail to arrive

THE collapse of a 'deep web' shopping site has left hundreds of angry consumers without their drugs.