TV CHEF Jamie Oliver forced a group of boys to try and achieve sexual fruition after they had encountered Cherie Blair, it has been claimed.
BP has asked Prince William and Kate Middleton if there is any chance they could invite Colonel Gaddafi to their wedding in April.
SCIENTISTS have found the earliest example of sour-faced meddling in a 15,000 year-old pub in Cheddar.
THE decomposing elephant from Channel 4's Life After Death has been spotted partying with Kerry Katona at a string of exclusive London clubs.
THE wave of protest across the Middle East needs a unifying theme that any moron can understand, it was claimed last night.
BRITAIN's ongoing economic turmoil could leave households unable to buy whatever they fancy, according to a new report.
THE government has abandoned plans to force trees off benefits and into work.
BRITAIN was heavy with disappointment last night as it emerged that Take That's riot police are just a group of non-violent dancers.