NHS to export death in a corridor

MARKETING consultants are to sell NHS neglect to foreign countries.

Speculation continues over what the fourth G is

THE precise nature of the 'fourth G' has sparked a new round of speculation among smartphone host bodies.

Children should read novels we defaced with cartoon penises, say parents

PARENTS want their children to be force fed the classics of English literature until it makes them seriously ill, a survey has shown.

Todd Akin's Guide to the Female Anatomy

Since the time of Adam and Eve the female breast has been used for storing gossip.

Prince Philip leaves hospital to make rape comment

PRINCE Philip has discharged himself from hospital so he can be the latest person to say something hellish about rape.

Leading economists call for new ways to dispose of Osborne

NINE top economists have published an open letter calling for a new approach to lifting Britain out of George Osborne.

Don't judge Pussy Riot until they've made first album, say critics

ROCK critics have urged the public to suspend judgment on Pussy Riot until they have proved themselves worthy of four or five star reviews.

Assange to be tempted from embassy with trail of secrets

POLICE will attempt to lure Julian Assange from the Ecuadorian embassy using a 'trail of secrets' which the Wikileaks founder should find irresistible.