PRIMATES from the northern half of rainforests are more likely to be dishonest than their southerly counterparts, scientists have claimed.
FAT, happy children who eat pizza do not waste their time asking a series of annoying, smart-arse questions, researchers have discovered.
BRITISH multiculturalism officially collapsed yesterday after Mrs Patel
neglected to return a Catherine Cookson book belonging to her white neighbour,
STEVE Coogan fans were dismayed last night after it emerged the actor is one of those people who has an opinion about Top Gear.
LAST year saw a record increase in the number of obvious lies about embarrassing surgery scars.
NEW York is bidding to reverse its plummeting violent crime figures by not letting anybody smoke.
WOMEN should be entitled to half of their boyfriend's disgusting pile of crap in the event of a split, according to a landmark ruling.
BRITAIN is the angry, racist, old widower who lives in that decrepit house at the end of the street, the UN has confirmed.