Britain trapped in downward spiral of bicycle addiction

BRITAIN is in the grip of a deadly addiction to bicycles, according to new research.

Zuckerberg's older brother obsessed with board game idea

42-YEAR-OLD Brian Zuckerberg, who still lives at home, thinks he has a really good idea for a board game.

New CCTV sees the evil in your soul

SURVEILLANCE cameras can now detect whether you are good or evil, it has emerged.

Universities praised for mediocrity

BRITAIN'S universities are adapting to the half-arsedness of the country, it has been claimed.

Intrepid humans begin incredible journey into telly

BRAVE 'tellynauts' are preparing to travel back in television time.

Pop sociology 'no longer useful'

A CONTROVERSIAL new pop sociology book claims that pop sociology has nothing left to say.

Hottest chili 'is also gay'

AN absurdly hot chili that also stimulates homosexual feelings has left British men deeply conflicted.

Advert banned instead of programme

THE advert for Channel Four's My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding is offensive, but the programme is not, it has been decided.