News

Earth hates Sting

PLANET Earth has confirmed that it really does not like Sting.

Office joker spends three hours a night running material

OFFICE joker Stephen Malley has admitted his seemingly spontaneous workplace quips are rigorously workshopped.

UK spared idiotic flag with a dragon on it

THE UK has been spared the prospect of a flag that looks like a tattoo on a cretin.

Brigadoon vanishes for another 100 years

THE magical land of Brigadoon has melted into the Highland mist.

Internet argument won by making things up

INTERNET debates can be won by simply inventing evidence, it has been confirmed.

Salmond votes ‘No’

ALEX Salmond has voted 'No' to Scottish independence.

Unemployment falls as IDS opens pie shop

A FALL in unemployment may be connected to Iain Duncan Smith’s new pie shop in central London.

Andy Murray offers to fund Scottish pension system

ANDY Murray has backed Scottish independence and offered to pay the country’s state pensions when everything goes to hell.