THE wait at Heathrow's border control is now so long that many become full UK citizens while queueing.
THE collapse of Clinton Cards could leave the UK’s easily-amused community unable to express its banal thoughts, it has been claimed.
THE government is appealing to children's sense of nostalgia by promoting potato croquette-based school dinners as having a 'retro vibe'.
AMERICAN rapper Everlast, impressed with the tributes given to Beastie Boy Adam Yauch, has been obsessing about how much press he'll get when he passes on.
THE amount of drivel on smoothie bottles could affect consumers' mental health, it has been claimed.
DOCTORS who refuse to work weekends will have them ruined by tedious family occasions, under new NHS plans.
AN underpants-based terror plot has fuelled speculation that Al Quaeda is being inspired by adult humour comic Viz.
TALENT coach Will I Am has been upbraided by producers of BBC1's The Voice after being filmed preparing a meal of prawn risotto during a live sing-off.