News

Online daters at risk from people pretending to be quirky

LONELY individuals seeking love online are being exploited by people who pretend to have funny little ways about them, it has emerged.

Cowell replaced by ageing, embittered drag queen

ITV's Shit Factor will return later this year with Simon Cowell being replaced by a contemptuous showbiz failure.

Churches to charge for choirboy photos

VISITORS to churches have been banned from photographing choristers unless they pay a sum based on the boy's prettiness.

British submarines 'can't go underwater'

BRITAIN's multi-billion pound Trident submarines do not work underwater, secret files have revealed.

Days before M1 returns to suicide-inducing normality

IT could be at least three days before motorists can return to pondering suicide on the M1, officials have warned.

Jacob's Creek unsurpassable, say Britons

EVERYTHING about Jacob's Creek is perfect, a survey has confirmed.


Super-injunction to ban promotion of films

A LEGAL move is being made to keep 95% of new films a secret.

Kissing lesbians offered free bottle of wine

TWO lesbians who kissed in a pub were offered a free bottle of white wine in a bid to crank things up a notch.