Britain 'must take more drugs'

FALLING drug use is a serious threat to the economy, ministers have warned.

Jimmy Savile 'presented Jim'll Fix It'

LEGENDARY sexual deviant Jimmy Savile presented a television programme called Jim'll Fix It, it has emerged.

US sitcoms 'pressurising women into kookiness'

A GLUT of kooky female sitcom characters is putting women under pressure to be pixie-like, it has been claimed.

Godzilla dies in Monster Island nursing home

THE 200ft tall mutant reptile Godzilla has passed away peacefully in his sleep.

Anything about drugs accused of glamorising drugs

ANY programme, book, film or remark about drugs makes them seem glamorous, it has emerged.

Stupid times require stupid solutions, says Romney

MITT Romney has relaunched his campaign with a direct appeal to America's fundamental stupidity.