News

Men discover florist that also sells fuel

HUSBANDS and boyfriends have been flocking to charming little flower shops that also have petrol.

Bafta glory for Optimus Prime

MASSIVE CGI robot Optimus Prime was the big winner at last night's Baftas, picking up Best Male Actor and Best Massive CGI Robot.

Greece 'stuck between a rock and actually paying tax'

GREECE could be forced to set up some kind of tax system, the country's prime minster has admitted.

Call for consensus on how to destroy the NHS

MPs must stop using the National Health Service as a political football so that it can be destroyed once and for all, it has been claimed.

Steiner schools blamed for this hat

THE Waldorf-Steiner education system is responsible for a piece of headgear that offends all aesthetic sensibilities, it has been claimed.

Bikes and cars fundamentally incompatible

THE combination of pedal-based transport and motor vehicles on roads is utterly insane, it has been confirmed.

Guardian-reading teacher suspended for tedious Facebook timeline

A TEACHER has been suspended after using her Facebook Timeline to expose pupils to the minutiae of her Guardian reading habits.

Drug lords back watered-down booze

PLANS to dilute alcoholic drinks have won the enthusiastic support of Britain's heroin kingpins.