ELECTRONICS giant Sony has grudgingly responded to the British public's single question about its sophisticated new tablet computer.
POLITICIANS in Syria have sobbingly asked William Hague if he can just give them a second chance.
LITHE snooker legend Steve Davis's new BBC radio show is going to put the sexy back into progressive rock music, it was claimed last night.
SAS recruitment problems may leave Britain's idiots with nothing to read on holiday, experts have warned.
THE UK's employees aren't going to be doing a lot this week, they have announced.
THE mystic role of eggs in Easter is based on Christ's love of eating them, experts have claimed.
FERVENT anti-royalists planning to burn effigies of William and Kate have been warned against making their own bootleg figurines.
ALMOST one thousand Anglicans are to mark Easter by making a slight adaptation to their voodoo.