News

Gatwick employs extra surly layabouts

GATWICK has doubled its staff of surly baggage-flingers.

Burning Man festival being explained in a patronising manner

PEOPLE who go to Burning Man festival have been explaining what it is in a slightly condescending tone.

Exciting new technology nowhere near ready

AN exciting new piece of technology is nowhere near ready and will never come into widespread use.

Kids switch from pirates to hitmen

CHILDREN have moved on from their love for pirates to a fascination with hired killers.

Millions forced into fantasy football

WORKERS are being coerced into joining complex and tedious fantasy football games.

Government weighing up pros and cons of ebola virus

DAVID Cameron has set up a Cabinet committee to decide if ebola is a bad thing.

UK to get referendum on opening Pandora’s box

BRITONS are expected to vote in favour of opening a box containing unspeakable evil.

Gherkins outside London available for £150,000

THE £640m asking price of London's Gherkin building is far more than Gherkins are fetching outside the capital.