News

Pope creates new saint to fight alongside him in battle against evil

THE Pope has used his canonising powers to create a new companion in his steadfast war against sin.

Not enough snow expected

BRITAIN will get just enough snow today to make driving a nightmare, but not quite enough to go home early.

Prodigy remix everything from the 1970s

THE Prodigy have delighted fans by remixing every piece of pop culture ephemera from the 1970s.

Landlords demand right of life and death over tenants

BRITISH landlords have demanded their powers over tenants be extended to life and death.

Falling inflation means system will find some other way to screw you

BRITAIN is waiting to find out how it will be made to pay dearly for low inflation.

London buses turned into flats

LONDON’S unused buses have been sold off as luxury apartments for the mega-rich.

Cadbury warned not to tamper with whatever the f**k is inside Creme Eggs

CREME Egg fans have told Cadbury not to change that weird shit in the middle.

Stupid business idea sickeningly successful

A TERRIBLE business idea has made an entrepreneur undeservedly rich, it has emerged.