THE death of Osama Bin Laden is a temporary glitch, purveyors of top quality fear have insisted.
TERRIFYING numbers of people are going nuts on the streets of England because two people they've never met are getting married in a big church.
ACROSS the country, British people are readying themselves for a once-in-a-lifetime fridge-cleaning moment.
MILLIONS of Playstation users are in turmoil after it emerged that the console had stolen huge chunks of their existences.
THE release of Snoop Dogg's 11th studio album is evidence of a link between marijuana use and prolific work rate, experts have claimed.
ELECTRONICS giant Sony has grudgingly responded to the British public's single question about its sophisticated new tablet computer.
POLITICIANS in Syria have sobbingly asked William Hague if he can just give them a second chance.
LITHE snooker legend Steve Davis's new BBC radio show is going to put the sexy back into progressive rock music, it was claimed last night.