LAST-MINUTE negotiations over Cheryl Cole's television career were
abruptly terminated last night after her management team decided to
start living actual lives.
APPLE fans last night welcomed the new iCloud service but said they would like a lovely box to put it in.
THE tricky boss at the end of level five of War on Terror has been killed by Americans, it emerged last night.
AN inquiry was launched last night into why it has taken more than a week to trace the Ecoli outbreak to the foulest of all vegetables.
MODERN magazines like Nuts lack the unpretentious honesty of Razzle and Knave, according to the prime minister.
A NEW repellent designed to deter mosquitoes has given the insects an insatiable hunger for Geordies.
THOUSANDS of relieved men have expressed their gratitude after buying fraudulent Take That tickets.
THE call centre bosses whose minions regularly upset your nan are still ignoring demands to destroy themselves, according to new research.