THE Middleton family has unveiled Britain's most middle class coat of arms.
FERTILITY treatment that uses DNA from three parents will give ungrateful adolescents somebody else to wish death upon.
'WE are the masters now', the beige tubes commonly known as Britain's favourite snack have told the human race.
A CAMERAMAN faces legal action after failing to make a wedding look better than it actually was.
LONELY individuals seeking love online are being exploited by people who
pretend to have funny little ways about them, it has emerged.
ITV's Shit Factor will return later this year with Simon Cowell being replaced by a contemptuous showbiz failure.
VISITORS to churches have been banned from photographing choristers unless they pay a sum based on the boy's prettiness.
BRITAIN's multi-billion pound Trident submarines do not work underwater, secret files have revealed.