Taxi drivers attend all-night mellow music festival

THOUSANDS of taxi drivers are returning from Cabfest, the drive-in mellow music festival.

Murdoch divorce after wife discovers pentagram

RUPERT Murdoch and his wife are to divorce after she stumbled across a pentagram painted in blood in the basement of their New York mansion.

Apprentices told to stop acting like twats

REAL-LIFE apprentices are acting like insane twats thanks to BBC One's The Apprentice, it has been claimed.

Cats head straight to cat pub

GPS collars have revealed that cats spend their nights in the nearest cat pub.

NSA offers to make Google's tax problems 'go away'

THE US National Security Agency has assured Google it can make its tax problems just disappear into thin air.

Turkish protestors threaten to deploy drunk Britons

PROTESTORS in Turkey have threatened to utilise drunk Britons against government forces.