Children evil

CHILDREN'S love of Halloween proves that they are innately evil, it has been claimed.

Tablet computers 'under too much pressure to be thin'

TABLET computers have attacked their makers' obsession with slender bodies.

'Trick or treat' supplies already eaten

BRITONS have already eaten the massive amount of sweets they ostensibly bought for trick or treaters.

Teenagers to be educated by historically accurate porn

ONLINE pornography must have detailed historical settings, according to new government guidelines.

America spied on Yorkshire ‘for about five minutes’

AMERICA’S National Security Agency tapped the phone calls of Yorkshire for five minutes before throwing its headphones across the room in horror.

Fun not achievable in adulthood

FUN for adults is a myth, it has emerged.

Eastenders now fully interactive

THE makers of EastEnders are willing to incorporate any viewer suggestions, however absurd or immoral.

Train travel complainants are Britain's fastest-growing fetish group

BRITONS are increasingly getting sexual gratification from complaining about train travel.