THE government is to overhaul road traffic enforcement to crack down on the sort of people who have no interest in elections.
MAX Mosley will have no idea when his bare bottom is about to be pummelled by a large, angry woman, pretending to be German.
PEOPLE who believe they are intolerant to certain foods have been advised to stop going on about it.
RICH parents could soon be offered the chance to waste up to £100,000 buying Oxbridge degrees for their cretinous children.
THE 2011 Sunday Times Rich List is almost identical to the 2011 Sleazy List, it emerged last night.
GENTLEMAN footballer Ryan Giggs has left his wife for softly-spoken Downton Abbey star Hugh Bonneville.
THE hat worn by Princess Beatrice at the Royal Wedding has been offered its own chat show.
CHRIST the Saviour has told the Archbishop of Canterbury to stop being such a pansy.
- Pop 'lesbians' to face bull dyke challenge
- Cash-strapped Area 51 tells captive aliens to get a job
- Anger as millions denied chance to look at Bin Laden's brain instead of working
- It's not telly if you watch it on a computer, say middle class people
- 'Team 6' to become film, boy band and washing-up sponge