A QUIET, middle-aged science fiction and traction engine enthusiast has advertised his virginity for £6 or nearest offer.
MOST mobile phones are now more intelligent than their teenage owners, it emerged last night.
HAGS and crones will take centre stage in the BBC's spring schedule as the corporation announces a big increase in witch-themed programming.
TAXI drivers in Southampton have installed signs reassuring passengers they speak nasty, ill-informed horseshit.
TREES will not uproot themselves and embark on blood-soaked killing sprees by 2035, global warming experts have admitted.