'COMING together' to make a success of Brexit is difficult if you believe it is a heap of shit, it has been claimed.
LONDON’s new ‘garden bridge’ will be grazed by herds of people living below the poverty threshold, it has been confirmed.
A WOMAN with a chaotic personal life and a history of believing in total nonsense is now being paid to give people advice, shocked friends have revealed.
CITY dwellers are completely cut off from the realities of modern life, according to a man from a tiny rural village.
MICHAEL Gove is hoping Donald Trump will hire him as his 'bumbling British butler' when he becomes president, it has emerged.
A GROUP of over 80 men is jostling to help push a broken-down car.
FICTION-BASED books, films and television programmes have been banned to avoid confusing idiots.
A MAN believes he is intellectually superior because he slavishly follows the implausible storylines of Sherlock, he has revealed.
- May tells GPs to offer Thai cooking classes
- Woman 'only drinks champagne' because she's a nightmare when pissed
- Flame-throwing mutant guitarist from Mad Max turns down Trump inauguration
- New housemate excited to reveal own personal brand of lunacy
- Woman quietly swaps 'Veganuary' for enormous amount of cheddar