SCI-FI film franchises will continue for thousands of years after every person currently living has passed away, Hollywood has confirmed.
NEWSREADER Jon Snow has told friends that he has become a crack addict for a documentary, despite not appearing to be followed by cameras.
MEN with hairy backs have given up trying to fit into civilisation and gone back to the woods from whence they came.
EASTENDERS has revealed who killed Lucy Beale without answering the crucial question of who was looking after the cafe at the time.
GREEK finance minister Yanis Varoufakis has expressed astonishment that the EU is still asking for money his country gave back in the pub weeks ago.
A RESTAURANT noted for its ‘vibrant’ and ‘bustling’ atmosphere is really just a wretched hellhole of noise and heat, it has emerged.
HAVING a racist attitude is not something you can reasonably boast about, it has been confirmed.
THE era of the driverless car means people will have to find other ways of venting their selfish, red-faced fury, it has been claimed.