PRESIDENT-ELECT Donald Trump will play a saxophone set at his January inauguration despite never having played it before.
SCOUTS are at supermarket tills asking for a charity donation to crush your groceries.
BREXITERS’ passionate opposition to a second referendum is definitely not because of fear they would lose, they have confirmed.
SCHOLARS have found that Dante’s epic Inferno contained a circle in Hell for Black Friday shoppers.
A BREXITER has confirmed that he is one of those people who always looks on the sunny side.
VERY few people on Facebook are complaining about proposed new laws on pornography, it has emerged.
MUMS are treating the fairly cold weather as if it were lethal radiation, it has been confirmed.
A TEENAGER’S belief that a local college course will lead to an amazing career in the media has been politely humoured by relatives.