Ex-pope still hanging around Vatican annoying everyone

EX-POPE Benedict is seriously getting under people’s feet at the Vatican, say cardinals.

'I will show mercy when we seize power', UKIP members tell workmates

UKIP members have told their workmates that their lives will probably be spared come the day of ultimate victory.

Slow computers just laid back

EASYGOING slow computers don't get why everyone is swearing at them.

I am just dreadful, admits Paltrow

GWYNETH Paltrow has admitted she is jaw-droppingly ghastly and awful.

Hitler barrel not fully scraped

HITLER-BASED entertainment bullshit will continue to be produced for another 200 years, experts have claimed.

'Volunteer Aid' seeks volunteers to rescue volunteers

A NEW international scheme is recruiting students to help save other gap year volunteers from their own stupidity.

Google Glass makes everything look like Knightmare

GOOGLE'S computer glasses immerse the wearer in the fantasy world of 90s kids TV show Knightmare, it has emerged.