A SURVEY of prescriptions written by homeopathic practitioners has found that 10 out of every 10 is riddled with unscientific garbage, according to a new study.
THE global search for a man who has not seen pornography has been abandoned after the discovery of a tattered copy of Knave stashed under a tribal totem in the South Pacific.
TRADITIONAL German Christmas markets are the vanguard of a massive Nazi invasion, it was claimed last night.
BRITAIN'S children are now just two years away from maximum thickness, according to the latest exam statistics.
MICROSOFT have admitted that some users of its new Windows 7 operating system have been confronted with the dreaded 'Black Screen of Paying £200 for Something That Doesn't Work'.
IRAN will soon find the five British yachtsmen they have captured quite unbearable, experts predicted last night.
FORMER Baywatch star David Hasselhoff's psyche is set to become a multi-million dollar tourist attraction, with rides, cafes and high strangeness.