News

Family’s excitement at getting on ferry rapidly fades

BEING on a ferry is f**king boring, a strike-hit British family has discovered.

Boss believes he’s not a prick outside of work

A MANAGER is under the impression that outside of work he somehow stops being a prick.

Dukes of Hazzard admit KKK membership

MOST characters in The Dukes of Hazzard were members of the Ku Klux Klan, Bo and Luke Duke have revealed.

Susanna Reid has large doner for breakfast

GOOD Morning Britain presenter Susanna Reid has a doner kebab at 7am every morning, it has been confirmed. 

DJ has been mediocre long enough to become a ‘house music legend’

A HOUSE music DJ and producer has been granted legendary status after not being very good for over twenty years.

Glastonbury glamping zone has machine gun turrets to keep out hippies

GUARDS at Glastonbury Festival’s boutique camping area are authorised to use deadly force against hippies, it has emerged.

Offline social networking service called ‘pub’ launched

A MIDDLE-AGED visionary has launched an offline service called ‘pub’, which allows friends to interact in a building.

Scotland arms grouse

THE SNP is to provide all grouse with sidearms and training before the start of shooting season.