YOUR brother-in-law has previewed his feeble excuses for driving drunk over the festive season.
THE pathetic obsession with posh people is caused by a desire to perform menial tasks for the upper classes, it has emerged.
A GROUP of 13-year-olds has revealed plans to get wasted this Christmas by eating a lot of chocolate liqueurs.
THE organisers of a UK moon landing have strenuously denied that it is an excuse to drink lager in space.
MCDONALD’S has revealed that its nuggets contain locally-sourced boy.
PODCAST listeners are unable to perform basic interactions without recommending podcasts, researchers have found.
BRITAIN’S cigarette addicts have confirmed that no amount of bad weather will stop them inhaling carcinogens.
THE royal family is now the intellectual property of the Walt Disney Company, it has emerged.