A HOMELESS man has returned a coffee that was given to him by someone exploiting Waitrose’s free drinks offer.
THE last of the renegade Nazis living in a self-sufficient lunar colony has died, aged 95.
THE other foods in your fridge are all scared of the cheese, it has emerged.
A MUSIC festival has invited punters to do whatever they like except bring in their own alcohol.
NIGEL Farage has resigned as leader of UKIP and been shipped to the island where all Nigels meet their end.
SCOTLAND has somehow managed to become even more unusual.
USING language to express ideas is far too much trouble, it has been agreed.
SCHOOL halls being used as polling stations have an overpowering childhood stench, it has been claimed.