News

Have you got the f**k over Harry Potter yet?

IT’S more than 10 years since the Harry Potter series finished, but some of its readers are still incapable of letting go and growing the fuck up. Are you one of them?

Harry and Meghan to follow wedding ceremony with massive Waitrose shop

PRINCE Harry and Meghan Markle are to follow their May 19th wedding with a big shop at the Windsor branch of Waitrose.

93 percent of adults still slightly afraid of the toilet monster

ALMOST every adult is still a little bit afraid the toilet monster might be real, it has been confirmed.

Young London couple build dream home out of avocado

A COUPLE have finally acquired their dream home by hollowing out an avocado and living inside it.

If it doesn’t make you piss in a wardrobe, is it really alcohol? asks Britain

BRITISH drinkers have confirmed that any alcoholic drink that does not make you vomit, start a fight or urinate in or on furniture is just fizzy pop.

'Dislike' button not mental enough, say Facebook users

FACEBOOK should introduce a button allowing you to send vile abuse and bloodcurdling threats to people automatically, internet users believe.

Man adopts weird accent after doing ancestry DNA test

A MAN who completed a DNA test has turned up at work with a bizarre accent.

Cafe owner would prefer invasion of bikers than middle-class mums

THE chaos and disruption of an invasion of middle-class mums and their spoilt children makes a Hell’s Angels rampage look like nothing, a cafe owner has claimed.