METEOROLOGISTS have confirmed that Ragnarok, the Viking apocalypse, will happen on Sunday.
POP music is all about respect for previous generations, it has been confirmed.
THE 7,500 fake marriages conducted in the UK are happier and more likely to last than genuine marriages, according to inspectors.
A BRAIN implant inspired by the film Avatar gives recipients an incredibly simplistic moral outlook, it has emerged.
THE Winter Olympics has switched its focus from sport to softcore pornography.
NON-SMOKERS would prefer electronic cigarettes to be fatal, it has emerged.
THE sinkholes appearing across Britain are an act of revenge by the badgers.
YOU and everyone you know is Adolf Hitler, it has been confirmed.