UK witchcraft up 700 per cent

WITCHCRAFT has increased by around 700 per cent across Britain in the last 12 months.

Man leaves speaker by open window to let everyone know how bad his taste in music is

A MAN has left his speaker by an open window in the hope that people will hear how awful his taste in music is and recommend something good.

Northern family has no-nonsense day out

A FAMILY from Bolton has gone on a blunt, plain-speaking and principled day out at a theme park.

Butterflies and bees thank Muhammad Ali for the compliment

BUTTERFLY and bee populations have paid tribute to Muhammad Ali and thanked him for his gracious compliment.

New series of Homeland to be set in reality

THE MAKERS of TV drama Homeland have announced that the next series will make the leap to being set in the real world.

Oh no darling, will you have less holiday? say straight-faced parents

PARENTS have reacted to school summer holidays being cut to five weeks with an outpouring of feigned sympathy.

Dogs refuse to recognise other dogs’ right to exist

DOGS are continuing to loudly resist the rights of other dogs to exist in the same street, park or garden as them.

Town launches urgent appeal to help man without a shed

A MIDLANDS town has launched an urgent charity campaign to help a 47-year-old man who has found himself without a shed.