News

Best way to get pesticides banned is to claim they're legal highs

ENVIRONMENTAL campaigners are claiming to get a massive buzz off harmful pesticides in order to get them banned.

Make final Pink Floyd album your final album, over-50s urged

ANYONE over 50 who still listens to music has been told they can have this one last Pink Floyd album and then stop.

Product somehow succeeds without social media bullshit

A PACKET of four-inch roofing nails is mysteriously selling to the public without having a Facebook page.

Phil Rudd latest victim of anti-drummer conspiracy, say drummers

AC/DC drummer Phil Rudd has been targeted by an international conspiracy to discredit drummers, it has been claimed.

John Lewis advert ‘condones penguin sex trafficking’

THE John Lewis Christmas advert has been condemned for promoting the trade in penguin sex slaves.

Engineers warn ‘Cheesegrater’ building may be full of capitalist sociopaths

A LANDMARK office building in the City of London could be full of people who are basically werewolves, it has emerged.

Obama to spend next two years doing socialist rituals in Kenya

BARACK Obama is to devote the pointless remainder of his presidency to being deliberately antagonistic.

Just kill me, says meat-like veggie burger

A VEGETARIAN burger that tastes like meat has said it would rather die than live a tragic double life.