As yet unmade series of Star Trek is shit, say Trekkies

STAR Trek fans have confirmed the new series of the show is a disgrace, six months before it begins filming.

Ex-raver dad delivers unconvincing drugs chat

A FATHER who used to take loads of Ecstasy has warned his teenage son of the perils of drugs.

Bear Grylls attempting to survive London on average salary

BEAR Grylls’ latest challenge is to live in London while earning £12.50 an hour.

Dad presses fog lights button as if deploying spy weapon

A 45-YEAR-OLD man has turned on his fog lights in the manner of a spy firing an under-bonnet machine gun.

Christmas 'train chaos' raises hope that relatives will be unable to visit

RAIL delays this Christmas could prevent tiresome family members from coming to your house, it has emerged.

Hospital parking charges ‘fair because most people just go there for a laugh'

MOST people who go to hospitals do so purely for fun, it has been claimed.

Teenage girl cynically pretending to be heartbroken about One Direction

A TEENAGE pop fan is having her first experience of overreacting to something in order to get attention.

Theresa May will scroll through the pictures on your phone

HOME Secretary Theresa May will press ahead with plans to look at everyone's  photos.