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JAM, THE FUEL OF TOMORROW, SAY LIB DEMS |
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THE Liberal Democrats have unveiled radical plans to reduce Britain's carbon emissions, including a new generation of cars that unleash the remarkable power of jam.
 Put a strawberry in your tank
Environment spokesman Chris Huhne said: "People say to me, 'oh no Chris, how are we going to get to work if you've killed all the petrol?' Fear not, I tell them, for I have harnessed the power of jam!"
Describing unleaded petrol as the "Khmer Rouge of high octane distillates" Huhne insisted the world's future energy demands could be met by boiling up a lot of soft fruit.
Huhne said the party had bought a 1998 Citroen Saxo which it hoped to convert to blackcurrant jam. "Blackcurrant is the easiest to work with, until we can find a way to stabilise raspberries," said Huhne.
"This is just the first step. I've been drawing sketches of huge triple-decker buses with on-board cinemas and swimming pools that run on low fat Nutella. And what about a jetpack filled with lemon curd?"
He added: "The only possible drawback we can envisage is an uncontrollable plague of gigantic killer wasps."
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