Britain First's space division tells alien rock to go back to its own bloody solar system

19-12-17

THE space department of Britain First has told the alien rock known as Oumuamua to go back to its own bloody solar system.

The BFSD, whose qualifications range from a D grade in GCSE Biology to having watched the first episode of Cosmos, said they were sick of these one-of-a-kind rock forms coming into our solar system and probably trying to sign on for Jobseeker’s Allowance.

A spokesman said: “This alien rock, whose name we’re too ignorant and lazy to remember, is clearly only here to blag some sort of rock operation on the NHS then get a free three-bed flat off the British government.

“What could Britain possibly gain from contact with a highly advanced alien civilisation whose technology surpasses our wildest imagining? We’ve already got Sky Sports, how could it get any better than that?”

He added: “Apparently it’s wrapped in a layer of organic insulation, which we’ll be seeking to ban it from wearing in public if it does pass by Earth.”

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