Science & Technology
THE reason dropped toast always lands on the buttered side is that everything is shit, according to scientists.
GROUNDBREAKING operating system Windows 95 has bought the market-leading Nokia 3210 to create a technological juggernaut.
3D IMAGERY of any kind has not been exciting since the 1983 film Jaws 3-D, it has been confirmed.
RESEARCHERS have found a man called Piers who seems normal.
VOYAGER 1 has expressed relief at being rid of the human race, as it leaves our solar system.
TRAVELLERS on a planned 'tubular transportation system' would be suffocated by human wind, it has been claimed.
TONIGHT'S meteor shower is essential viewing, according to carnivorous alien plants.