Science & Technology

'Snooper's Charter' gives government powers everyone thought it already had

THE new draft of the 'Snooper's Charter' will allow police to see all the internet data you assumed they could see already, it has emerged.

‘So-called experts’ actually experts

PEOPLE who decided to ignore 'the so-called experts’ have conceded that they did in fact have useful knowledge.

Tangled cables told to f*ck off

THESE tangled cables need to go f*ck themselves, it has been confirmed.

Man experimenting with antisocial ways of parking his car

A MAN is trying different ways of parking his car to find the ones that cause maximum annoyance.

Scientists completely fail to explain ‘gravitational waves’

SCIENTISTS are under attack after making a huge fuss about ‘gravitational waves’ then failing to explain what they are.

Scientist with The Sims 4 accused of playing God

A GENETICIST who owns a copy of The Sims has been accused of attempting to control life itself.

Humanity not ready for Easter egg-sized Creme Egg

SCIENTISTS have confirmed that you are not ready for a Easter egg-sized Cadbury’s Creme Egg.

Parents give custody of kids to iPad

AN IPAD has become the legal guardian of two children after their parents could no longer be arsed.