Science & Technology

Women Call For £10 Billion G-Spot Expedition

BRITISH women are calling for an 'unprecedented national effort' after new scientific evidence suggested the fabled G-spot may be real.

Would-Be Saints Must Have Virgin Mary's Mobile Number, Says Vatican

CANDIDATES for sainthood will have to meet more demanding criteria, including regular contact with the Virgin Mary, either via mobile phone or email.

Humans Declare War On Earth-Like Planets

THE Milky Way galaxy could contain thousands of planets with conditions suitable for life and war, according to new research.

Heathrow Installs Roulette Wheel Luggage System

ALL luggage checked-in at Heathrow airport is to be thrown onto a giant roulette wheel in a bid to increase its chances of arriving at the correct destination. 

Nokia Unveils Pointless Thing

MOBILE phone giant Nokia has pledged to make pocket maps obsolete with the launch of a map that fits in your pocket.

Designer Unveils Hypersonic Invisibility Boots

A BRITISH designer has unveiled plans for a pair of hypersonic  boots which will enable the wearer to walk from Europe to Australia in less than 10 seconds while remaining totally invisible.

Apple To Charge $2000 For Shit In A Box

APPLE boss Steve Jobs yesterday unveiled the computer giant's latest eye-catching innovation: one of his shits in a simple white box.

Scientists Unveil World's Fastest Carrot

SCIENTISTS in the US last night claimed they had created a ‘supercarrot’ with a top speed of nearly 770 mph.