Benefit Cheats Very Good At Lying, Warn Experts

03-12-08

BENEFIT cheats are accomplished liars who would relish the challenge of a polygraph test, experts warned last night.

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Michelangelo was claiming benefits the whole time
As the government outlined plans to use lie detectors to catch illegal welfare claimants, psychologists said a new breed of heroes was about to emerge in Britain's rundown housing estates.

Dr Wayne Hayes, of Reading University, said: "I have no doubt that by end of next year there will be 'Trump' cards listing number of tests completed, illegal money accumulated and of course 'best ever lie'.

"They spend a great deal of time constructing their lies, co-ordinating them and then embellishing them with the most wonderfully authentic details.

"I sometimes think it must be a bit like watching Michelangelo painting the Sistine Chapel."

He added: "Of course they also spend a huge amount of time lying to each other. Partly because it helps them to hone their skills, but also because they're sleeping with each other's horribly tattooed baby-mothers."

A government spokesman said: "The lie detectors will be state-of-the-art, but just to make absolutely sure we will be testing each of them using Jacqui Smith."

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