BNP Question Time To Replace Christmas For Guardian Readers
THE British National Party's annual appearance on Question Time is set to become the new festive season for Guardian readers.
As the BBC confirmed BNP lunatic Nick Griffin will be invited on to the show every year, Guardian readers across London booked time off and started planning a series a joyless, po-faced events.
Eleanor Shaw, a mother of two from Finsbury Park, said: "We'll have a BNP Question Time tree but we'll decorate it with all the colours of the rainbow and attach a little photograph of Whoopi Goldberg to the top.
"And we'll invite the whole family to BNP Question Time dinner and have a really useful and interesting debate when Granny says something unbelievably racist.
"And then we'll all stand around the piano and sing Free Nelson Mandela and a selection of favourites from The Joshua Tree."
Meanwhile the Guardian confirmed it will mark the annual holiday with a BNP Question Time video message from Polly Toynbee where the columnist will look back on the year and thank all those who have devoted themselves to keeping the public sector so pointlessly expensive and inefficient.
Mrs Shaw added: "It's such a special time of the year for the children of Guardian readers. They leave out a glass of milk, a mince pie and a carrot and then think about how asylum seekers don't have any of these things no matter what the Daily Mail says.
"Then there's all the excitement of staying up past 10 o'clock so they can see how clever their daddy is as he demolishes Mr Griffin's arguments one by one.
"And then, when the programme is finished, they can open their presents, which will most likely be the updated paperback edition of The State We're In by Will Hutton, or one of Jeanette Winterson's angry lesbian rants."