Date going well until he goes and orders the f**king cheese board

05-12-17

A FIRST date was going absolutely brilliantly until he only went and ordered the f**king cheese board, a woman has confirmed. 

Susan Traherne admitted that for 95 per cent of the evening Joseph Turner had behaved absolutely impeccably, there was chemistry and she had begun to believe this could be the real thing, but she has since blocked his calls. 

She continued: “Handsome, was genuinely interesting, enjoyed laughing at my jokes as much as I enjoyed laughing at his. And then. 

“The waiter asked if we wanted pudding, and he said ‘Oh, I think we could manage something, don’t you?’ and I was like okay, that does it, I am breaking my first date rule. 

“And then I came back from the toilet and he was sitting there with it. Blue, veiny, stinking. I think it called ‘Martin’s Dairy Yarg’.

“Then was another one on the plate called ‘Perky’s Blue’ which looked like it had been scraped off a dead jellyfish.

“I was in tears as soon as I got in the taxi. He texted me after about what a ‘great time’ he’d had and I could barely see for the rage. 

“I’m going to warn other women on social media. He needs to be stopped.”

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