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	<title>The Daily Mash &#187; Society</title>
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		<title>Male aggression caused by chafing</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/male-aggression-caused-by-chafing-2013051769251</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 17 May 2013 10:33:03 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[STOCKY men are aggressive because their clothes are constantly chafing.]]></description>
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		<title>Older workers kept alive by hate</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/older-workers-kept-alive-by-hate-2013051769102</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 17 May 2013 07:53:39 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[PEOPLE who don't retire live longer because they are fuelled by hatred for their co-workers.]]></description>
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		<title>Science fiction fans now harder than football fans</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/science-fiction-fans-now-harder-than-football-fans-2013051668958</link>
		<pubDate>Thu, 16 May 2013 08:02:39 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[SCIENCE fiction conventions are attracting more hard bastards than football matches, it has emerged.]]></description>
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		<title>Most men &#8216;don&#8217;t know what masculinity is&#8217;</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/most-men-dont-know-what-masculinity-is-2013051668946</link>
		<pubDate>Thu, 16 May 2013 07:21:29 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[MOST British men have no idea what masculinity would actually involve, it has been confirmed.]]></description>
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		<title>Cashpoint morons warned to plan ahead</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/cashpoint-morons-warned-to-plan-ahead-2013051568852</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 May 2013 09:53:26 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[SIMPLY deciding in advance what you want from a cashpoint can stop others wanting to kill you, it has been claimed.]]></description>
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		<title>Oh good, feminism&#8217;s back, say men</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/oh-good-feminisms-back-say-men-2013051568778</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 May 2013 08:07:50 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/?p=68778</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[MEN were last night delighted to discover that feminism is making a comeback.]]></description>
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		<title>Britons could be forced to stop beating each other up</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/britons-could-be-forced-to-stop-beating-each-other-up-2013051568772</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 May 2013 07:59:30 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/?p=68772</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A CRISIS in A &#38; E means Britons may be forced to reconsider whether they can have a fight this weekend.]]></description>
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		<title>All TV ads to be &#8216;phases of life&#8217; montage</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/phases-of-life-montage-compulsory-for-tv-adverts-2013051468678</link>
		<pubDate>Tue, 14 May 2013 10:23:11 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/?p=68678</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[TELEVISION adverts must show a couple getting together, having kids and then sending their kids to university, according to new guidelines.]]></description>
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		<title>McDonald&#8217;s buys rights to &#8216;summer babies&#8217;</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/mcdonalds-buys-rights-to-summer-babies-2013051068271</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 10 May 2013 10:12:45 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/?p=68271</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[BABIES born in summer will be handed over to McDonald's when they reach 13 years of age.]]></description>
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		<title>Savile&#8217;s relationship with police &#8216;only looked horribly corrupt&#8217;</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/saviles-relationship-with-police-only-looked-horribly-corrupt-2013051068208</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 10 May 2013 08:53:29 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/?p=68208</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[JIMMY Savile's relationship with West Yorkshire Police could have seemed corrupt to the untrained eye, according to an official report.]]></description>
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		<title>64% of driving favours totally unacknowledged</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/64-of-driving-favours-totally-unacknowledged-2013051068171</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 10 May 2013 07:57:00 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Featured]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[IF you reverse to let another driver pass they will probably not even wave, it has emerged.]]></description>
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		<title>Ludicrous medieval pantomime may explain UK’s problems</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/ludicrous-medieval-pantomime-may-explain-uks-problems-2013050968003</link>
		<pubDate>Thu, 09 May 2013 07:55:27 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[THE unbelievably ridiculous state opening of Parliament may offer a clue as to why the UK has problems, experts have claimed.]]></description>
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		<title>Britain now stupid enough to emulate Kerry Katona</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/britain-now-stupid-enough-to-emulate-kerry-katona-2013050867848</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 May 2013 10:17:34 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[BRITAIN'S average intellect is now so low that Kerry Katona could be seen as a role model.]]></description>
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		<title>Festivalgoers rebelling against self-esteem</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/festivalgoers-rebelling-against-self-esteem-2013050867782</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 May 2013 08:35:40 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[PERSONAL dignity is now the top thing to rebel against at music festivals.]]></description>
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		<title>Primark bans attractive people</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/primark-bans-attractive-people-2013050867785</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 May 2013 08:00:39 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[BUDGET clothing giant Primark has banned good-looking people from its shops.]]></description>
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		<title>Dogs asked to reason with burglars</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/dogs-must-reason-with-burglars-2013050767774</link>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 May 2013 11:25:32 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[News Briefly Box]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[DOGS are being asked to explain to burglars why they&#8217;re letting themselves down.  As new laws are introduced banning dogs from biting intruders, the government has asked them to instead engage thieves in a debate about the moral implications of stealing. Three-year-old Alsatian Roy Hobbs said: &#8220;Apparently I&#8217;m supposed to offer burglars a hot drink [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Journalist to give up writing gimmicky bullshit features for a month</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/journalist-to-give-up-writing-gimmicky-bullshit-features-for-a-month-2013050767741</link>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 May 2013 09:10:08 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/?p=67741</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A JOURNALIST is to spend a month not writing features about giving things up for a fixed period of time.]]></description>
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		<title>Beer gardens not actually gardens</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/beer-gardens-not-actually-gardens-2013050767711</link>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 May 2013 07:52:29 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Featured]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/?p=67711</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A CONCRETE area attached to a pub is not a garden, it has been claimed.]]></description>
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		<title>Timebombs surprisingly dull</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/timebombs-actually-very-dull-2013050367616</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 03 May 2013 11:14:45 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[News Briefly Box]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[THE interest-only mortgage timebomb has confirmed that timebombs are overrated.  Professor Henry Brubaker of the Institute for Studies said: &#8220;On hearing the word &#8216;timebomb&#8217; one&#8217;s initial reaction is &#8216;run, run, just go, now!&#8217; &#8220;But actually it&#8217;s just an absurdly sensationalised way of describing pretty much anything. &#8220;See also the obesity timebomb, the immigration timebomb and [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>&#8216;I will show mercy when we seize power&#8217;, UKIP members tell workmates</title>
		<link>http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/i-will-show-mercy-when-we-seize-power-ukip-members-tell-workmates-2013050367548</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 03 May 2013 09:26:48 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Society]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[UKIP members have told their workmates that their lives will probably be spared come the day of ultimate victory.]]></description>
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