Opera is really poofy, say five year-olds
BRITAIN’S five year-olds have dismissed opera as a big gay thing full of benders.
Poofido Domingay, Hosegay Carrerarse and Queeriano Pooferotti
In a survey of year one primary school pupils, 97 per cent said watching some fat old men and women singing was the gayest thing they could possibly think of.
Kyle McKay, five and a half from Bridlington, said: “Look at that fucking nonce, prancing like a fairy.
“Why don’t you go home and sing to your boyfriend, you chubby freak?”
Amy Bishop, from Doncaster, added: “I don’t want none of your poofy opera, all poofing about and being a big gay bender.
“When I hear opera all I can think of is a boy kissing another boy. It makes me want to puke up my Coco Chunks.”
And Jason Hobbs, from Darlington, said: “My mummy made me watch Billy Elliot on the telly. If he’s not a total bum gayer then I’ll eat my Walt Disney World Paris baseball cap with the big Mickey Mouse ears on it.”
Meanwhile gay activists have protested at having to be subjected to British children.
A spokesman for the campaign group OKGay said: “We are recommending that all gay performers withdraw their co-operation from pantomimes, theme parks and children’s television.
“It is both sad and shocking that in the 21st century Britain’s under 12s remain completely inappropriate.”
