Society

ISA changes delight tedious bastards

DULL people are over the moon about the new 'super ISA' savings scheme.

Smoothie label includes dark sexual fantasies

A MANGO smoothie has admitted having warped desires, via a block of text on its packaging.

The heartbreaking moment Mail Online journalist realised his soul had died

THIS picture shows the very moment at which a journalist discovered he had died inside.

Prisoners face roach crisis

A BAN on books in British prisons has deprived inmates of makeshift cigarette filters, according to insiders.

Everyone too up themselves to make the tea

WORKERS are going without hot drinks because everyone in the office thinks they're above making tea, it has emerged.

Bristol is best city because you can smoke weed in the street

BRISTOL is the UK's best city to live in because cannabis is unofficially legal there, it has been claimed.

Modern youth not starting a subculture unless they get paid for it

TEENAGERS are refusing to start an era-defining subculture unless there's money involved.

Most people going to blow hell out of pension pot within 20 minutes

MOST Britons will spend their pension pot on stupid, crazy stuff the very moment they get their hands on it.