Society

Friend-with-benefits votes to reduce benefits

A WOMAN has announced a unilateral reduction in benefits for her casual sexual partner.

Father praised for looking after child for four whole hours

A MAN has won plaudits for looking after his daughter for a whole afternoon without supervision from his wife.

Geordie with posh voice baffles workmates

A MAN from Tyneside who sounds like Tom Hiddlestone has left his new London workmates baffled and frustrated.

Non-Londoner assumed night out in West End would be pleasurable

A MAN visiting London stupidly believed a night out in the West End would be enjoyable.

Parents realise child's first birthday party is total waste of time

A CHILD’S first birthday was marked by his parents going out for a meal, they confirmed.

Woman manages to delete Facebook app without making a huge fuss

A WOMAN has caused concern among her friends by deleting Facebook from her phone without making a big deal out if it

Teabag not given proper two-hour side-of-sink mourning period

NORTHERN parents are furious with their son for throwing a used teabag straight in the bin instead of showing it the proper respect.

Royalists now just weird people

THE only people who support the monarchy are rather strange with a lot of time on their hands, it has emerged.