Dogs refuse to recognise other dogs’ right to exist

DOGS are continuing to loudly resist the rights of other dogs to exist in the same street, park or garden as them.

Town launches urgent appeal to help man without a shed

A MIDLANDS town has launched an urgent charity campaign to help a 47-year-old man who has found himself without a shed.

Churchill reference a bit obscure, worries racist

A BRITISH patriot is worried that the five pound note featuring Winston Churchill is too obscure for its target audience.

Student realises his life is polar opposite of Jack Wills advert

A STUDENT having a post-wank piece of toast has realised his existence could not be less like clothes company Jack Wills’ depiction of university life.

Woman’s vegetarian fad passes 30-year mark

THE parents of a 45-year-old vegetarian woman are confident that she will soon start eating meat again.

Furious 'cheese rollers' discover cheese also available from shops

‘CHEESE rolling’ participants in Gloucestershire are furious after discovering that cheese can simply be purchased from a shop.

Stair gate stops child, dog and grandmother

A STAIR gate has proved to be a successful barrier to a baby, a pet dog and a grandmother.

Woman thrown out of bar for ordering non-artisan gin

A WOMAN has been ejected from a bar for not caring about the 400 different brands of gin on offer.