Old gay couple who run rural post office ‘definitely into chemsex’

TWO SEMI-RETIRED gay men who run a village post office are enjoying massive orgies on crystal meth, it has been claimed.

Man believed to be flirting

COLLEAGUES of Tom Logan believe his recent unusual behaviour maybe his attempt to flirt with a woman.

Teacher recruitment crisis linked to millions of little bastards

SCHOOLS are struggling to fill teaching posts because the job involves being in the same room as children.

Community of lost Christmas shoppers discovered in Westfield

A WRETCHED group of last year’s Christmas shoppers has been found wandering London’s Westfield centre.

28-year-old asks when she can stop pretending to like nightclubs

A 28-YEAR-OLD woman has asked how many more years she has to spend pretending to like nightclubs.

Wearing jeans prevents you from getting old

WEARING denim can ward off old age and even prevent death altogether, it has emerged.

FHM reader too sad to light own fart

A DEPRESSED FHM reader has passed up the opportunity to ignite his anal gas, it has emerged.

Muslim man in Northampton asked what he's doing about ISIS

A 38-YEAR-OLD Muslim working as a land surveyor in Northampton has been asked how he plans to stop ISIS.